{"id":6344,"date":"2022-06-18T16:23:44","date_gmt":"2022-06-18T16:23:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bloomsoup.com\/?p=6344"},"modified":"2022-06-18T16:23:45","modified_gmt":"2022-06-18T16:23:45","slug":"dating-an-overthinker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bloomsoup.com\/dating-an-overthinker\/","title":{"rendered":"Dating an Overthinker: How to Handle Their Constant Worries"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
“Are you coming on holiday then?”, asked my girlfriend.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I’d spent weeks thinking about it, making zero progress, trapped in a vicious vortex of indecision.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I’d considered every possibility of what to do that summer but just wasn’t sure I could justify the expenditure or time off work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I seemed incapable of pulling the choice trigger. And analyzing my options didn’t help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If anything, it just created more doubt, to the point that I was terrified I’d make the wrong decision, as if such a thing existed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Naturally, my girlfriend was annoyed, (as any fully functional human would be), by my inability to make a simple choice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You see, one of the worst aspects of dating an overthinker is that a partner can’t make plans.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Invariably, if they wait for an overthinker to finally decide, they’ll be waiting forever!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Do you have a partner who can’t help but worry about everything?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If so, then you know just how challenging they can be to date and how much conflict the condition can create.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In this blog post, we will discuss how to handle it and maintain a healthy relationship – plus I’ll let you know whether I actually went on holiday, you lucky little sausage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Note: if you want to read the best books on overthinking, click here<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Likely you already know if you’re in this position as you’ll probably be pulling your hair out in frustration.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The biggest signs of the condition tend to be rumination on past events or excessive worry about the future.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Here are some common issues faced by an overthinker:<\/p>\n\n\n\n An overthinker will tend to worry about everything in their relationship, from whether they’re good enough for their partner to whether their partner is cheating on them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This can lead to a lot of conflicts, arguments, and significant stress for both partners.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But it’s not just the big issues that cause problems…<\/p>\n\n\n\n Indeed, often it’s the cumulative effect of the small daily decisions<\/a> that take their toll.<\/p>\n\n\n\n An overthinker will ponder every small choice and option, and seek validation from their partner before taking action.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I honestly have the potential to mentally poke and prod pretty much every aspect of my life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Minor things such as what to do on their day off, what was said at a party, or which hoover to buy can cause huge psychological roadblocks for the professional overthinker.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Trust me – I’ve been there, sliding down the research rabbit hole, convinced that if I just gather more information then my future worries will be easier to manage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n As the individual in the couple who has to manage this analysis paralysis, it can become extremely tiring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So let’s look at some pros and cons if you’re considering your situation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s not all doom and gloom. Dating an overthinker can be challenging, but it also has its perks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Here are some pros and cons to consider:<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you have a good balance of personality types as a couple, it can work well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For example, my girlfriend is quite an intuitive person, able to use her gut feeling to effectively make decisions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Combine this with a more analytical personality, and you may find that you’re able to meet somewhere in the middle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you’re dating an overthinker, remember that their worrying isn’t personal – it’s just the way they are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So, here’s some advice for dealing with the situation:<\/p>\n\n\n\n An overthinker needs a patient and understanding partner who can offer support and reassurance when they’re feeling anxious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n They also need someone who’s willing to listen to their worries and help them find solutions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Avoid getting into arguments about their fears<\/a>, as this will only make things worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Instead, try to gently encourage them to see the positive side of things.<\/p>\n\n\n\n All of this is easier said than done I know!<\/p>\n\n\n\n As an overthinker, I have both admiration and compassion for affected partners. They deserve a medal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you’re trying to support someone trapped in their own head, there are a few things you should (and shouldn’t) say:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Saying the wrong thing can make your partner feel dismissed or invalidated, so make sure you monitor their response and recycle effective strategies for future use.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If your partner suffers from this affliction, there are a few practical interventions that might help:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dating an overthinker can be hard for a partner, but it shouldn’t put you off if you truly have feelings for the other person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s a psychological phenomenon that can be managed with the right support.<\/p>\n\n\n\n However, it’s vital that you consider your own mental health too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Emotionally, it may become draining and you’ll need psychological stamina to help your partner navigate their recursive thoughts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If in doubt, consider professional couples therapy to address the situation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So I finally did go on holibops, and low and behold, had a splendid time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This incident was just one in a long line of many that taught me about the wasted energy of overthinking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Despite our best intentions to nail the perfect decision and mitigate against mistakes, there are no wrong outcomes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We can’t change the past and often don’t have much control over the future, so simply pick the best option on the available evidence; ideally, one that leads to personal growth<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then get busy living life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Are you dating an overthinker? <\/p>\n If so, you might be frustrated by their constant worrying and analysis paralysis.<\/p>\n So click here to learn more.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6348,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[101],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nSigns you’re dating an overthinker<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
How does overthinking affect relationships?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
The benefits and drawbacks of this type of relationship<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Benefits<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Drawbacks<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
How to deal with this type of relationship<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
What this person needs in a relationship<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
What do you tell someone who is overthinking? (and what not to say!)<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Do<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Don’t<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Practical Tips<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Prioritizing your own health as the partner<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Summary<\/h2>\n\n\n\n