{"id":4634,"date":"2020-12-03T20:38:12","date_gmt":"2020-12-03T20:38:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bloomsoup.com\/?p=4634"},"modified":"2021-09-19T15:13:51","modified_gmt":"2021-09-19T15:13:51","slug":"dwysywd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bloomsoup.com\/dwysywd\/","title":{"rendered":"DWYSYWD: Do What You Say You Will Do"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
I’ve just said I’d do something with a friend and quickly realise I can’t. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I feel like a yes man, enthusiastically agreeing to an engagement I can’t attend. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
DWYSYWD or ‘do what you say you will do’ might not seem important on the surface, but in reality, it has an outsized impact on your life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jim Kouzes and Barry Posner are elite educators who wrote The Leadership Challenge<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Their first law of leadership is, \u201cIf you don\u2019t believe the messenger, you won\u2019t believe the message.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n That’s to say, gaining trust is essential to become a better leader<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n To build that trust, we have their second law of leadership\u2026DWYSYWD.<\/p>\n\n\n\n DWYSYWD is an acronym that stands for ‘do what you say you will do’.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are two areas where it’s important; internal credibility and external expectations. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Both can have a sizable effect on psychology and performance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We all have goals. Common examples include: <\/p>\n\n\n\n How often do you tell yourself that it’s time to take action<\/a>? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Compare that with your completion ratio. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Like most people (myself included) you promise you’ll get started soon, instilling good habits<\/a> and productive routines<\/a>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n But you never do, because you’re unwilling to face the discomfort of behaviour change. <\/p>\n\n\n\n You frequently dream of lifestyle improvements, but never put in the work to make them happen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n You leave an array of broken promises, half-formed ambitions and abandoned goals in your wake. <\/p>\n\n\n\n And in addition to remaining stuck through inaction, there’s a higher psychological cost to pay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you can’t trust yourself, who can you trust? <\/p>\n\n\n\n By setting goals<\/a> and failing to perform the smaller actions required to achieve them, your word becomes worthless. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Once or twice won’t have much effect, but what if this becomes a regular habit? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Over the long term, you’re identity and self-worth suffers. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Even during the initial excitement of goal setting, underlying doubt exists regarding your commitment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n You won’t see yourself as the type of person capable of making yourself a promise following through.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Have you ever told friends you’d do something before guiltily reneging on the agreement thereafter? <\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s a common problem, especially for people-pleasers, who may exhibit deeper childhood self-esteem issues around likeability. <\/p>\n\n\n\n By seeking desperately to avoid social conflict, these people constantly feel like they must agree to ideas, suggestions and offers that don’t interest them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n They never wish to hurt another’s feelings by rejecting an invitation, resulting in misaligned social offers and subsequent panic. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Despite their verbal agreements, they subsequently backtrack or cancel at the last minute, letting others down in the process.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Everyone has a subconscious trust quota for their friends, family and contacts. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Each time these people don’t act in accordance with your expectations, your confidence in them diminishes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Not following through on a verbal contact and DWYSYWD is the quickest way to squander trust. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Imagine if you’re a leader and consistently make hollow promises. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It’s unlikely you’ll gain much respect or leverage. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Here’s the thing – if you simply communicate clearly<\/a> and honestly regarding your planned course of action, even rejection becomes palatable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Firstly you need to get honest with yourself. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Knowing what you want makes it much easier to set goals you can realistically achieve and stick to plans you’ve made. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Check out my life purpose<\/a> and planning<\/a> articles to understand a value-based system for decision-making.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Rushing into hasty goal setting is inadviseable. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Likewise, making or agreeing to plans in extreme haste may reduce your follow-through rate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Buy yourself some time. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If there’s a social invitation, don’t feel obligated to provide an immediate answer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Building the do what you say you will do muscle is much easier when a plan feels achievable. <\/p>\n\n\n\n After setting a goal and corresponding habit, deconstruct the behaviour into its smallest manageable component and start there. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Want to get stronger? Do one pull up a day and progress from there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is key. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Always DWYSYWD, even and especially when<\/em> you don’t feel like it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If we’ve taken the time to set a goal or make a plan, there’ll always be times we can’t be bothered or aren’t in the mood. <\/p>\n\n\n\n We must ignore these transient feelings and stick to our word, treating it as gospel. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Even if we’re tired and can’t face going to the gym, a bad workout is better than no workout. <\/p>\n\n\n\n More important than performance is the training of staying true to our word.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Doing what we say we will do is essential to build both internal and external credibility. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If we want to trust ourselves and honour our commitments, we must practice following through, even when we don’t feel like. <\/p>\n\n\n\nInternal credibility<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Trust yourself<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
External expectations<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Trust placed in you<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
What to do<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Gain Clarity<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Give yourself time<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Start small<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Always follow through<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Summary<\/h2>\n\n\n\n