It’s a process which must be embraced, despite the discomfort of breaking free from your current avatar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Let’s take a look.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Your present avatar<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Identity formation begins in childhood as thoughts and beliefs accumulate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We strive to maintain that self-image into adulthood, even if it’s not in our best interest, clinging to bad habits and unhelpful behaviours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In a film or book, a protagonist rarely acts counter to their motivations or out of alignment with their role.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Similarly, our minds seeking cognitive harmony in real life, encouraging behaviour consistent with our self-image.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Furthermore, it’s preferable to remain in the role we’ve created due to the discomfort of breaking character to try something new.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The only problem? Our identity, formed during adolesence, often doesn’t make for the best movie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Just as a director would modify a character to improve the end result, we must give ourselves similar permission to edit our story.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Fortunately, as a mind-made phenomenon, our narrative isn’t fixed and change is possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
How to decide when to break character<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Firstly, we must decide which parts of our movie need editing:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
- Look at who you envy and wish you could emulate<\/li>
- Identify things you’re slightly scared to do<\/li>
- Earmark activities that arouse interest and curiosity<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n
Secondly, we can identify activities we’re hesitant to pursue by finishing the following sentences:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
- I’m not the type of person who\u2026<\/li>
- I don’t believe\u2026<\/li>
- I don’t like\u2026<\/li>
- I don’t want\u2026<\/li>
- I can’t be bothered\u2026<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n
Surface level, your completed sentences might sound like legitimate, valid reasons for inactivity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Let’s say you don’t believe you can start a business, for example. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now, examine the basis for this belief. Have you ever tried? How many times?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sure, you might not even enjoy running a business, but why use a false belief to deny yourself the opportunity if it’s something you want to try?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That would be a cop-out, your present character self-sabotaging a potential storyline before it’s even begun.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
However, the real culprit for inaction is often fear<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Constantly test your existing character by questioning the validity of your assumptions\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then intentionally experience that which you resist to see where you stand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This is why I like 30-day challenges<\/a>, because they allow us to dip our toes in the water of behaviour change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A couple of personal examples:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
- I believe in exercise – this is a valid assumption; good empirical evidence exists for its benefits and personal experience demonstrates that I feel better engaging in this healthy habit<\/a>.<\/li>
- I believe in minimalism<\/a>. Is this useful frame or just a response to fear of spending money and financial scarcity? Investing in a few quality purchases and exploring my reactions to these lifestyle decisions is an ongoing area of exploration.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n
![\"art](\"https:\/\/bloomsoup.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/pexels-photo-264905.jpeg\")
<\/figure>\n\n\n\nHow to break character<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Okay, so you have an idea of areas to work on. Here are three tips to get going:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Choose a role model<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Imagine someone you admire and what they would do in your situation, before following suit. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It can be someone you know, a famous person, or even a fictional character. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
You can also choose different individuals for different activities, as long as they motivate you to follow the optimal course of action.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Treat life as the game it is<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Imagine life is a computer game or stimulation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There are no negative consequences in this realm, and rather than taking every experience so seriously, you simply play for fun! <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Explore the game with curiosity and embark on fascinating adventures with your new character. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Make different decisions, take more risks, and act positively.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Don’t overthink <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
It’s tough to think your way out of existing thought patterns. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
You end up chasing your tail, tying yourself in knots. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
To break free from our current reality requires action<\/a>, even if we don’t possess all the answers before beginning. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It’s always possible to steer a moving ship, course-correcting as we sight additional reference points. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Furthermore, when we act out of character for long enough, our thoughts and beliefs slowly catch up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Considerations of breaking character<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
As with any lifestyle change, there are consequences to consider.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
External criticism<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Firstly, you might get kickback from those around you, in response to your character behaving differently. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
After all, they’re starring in their own movie, in which you play a supporting role. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
By behaving differently, you suddenly threaten the narrative they’ve created. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you associate with unhealthy people, for example, and suddenly improve your diet, it can appear as an attack on their lifestyle choices. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alternatively, if you’ve experienced a breakup, your lifestyle choices might seem odd to an ex-partner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Such pushback is inevitable and there are three possible outcomes:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
- You become intimidated and retreat into your familiar character to keep the peace<\/li>
- Your friends and family adjust their narrative to accommodate your character change<\/li>
- You write one another out of the shared storyline and seek alternative, aligned co-stars<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n
Cognitive dissonance<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Another factor to consider is that even having changed your character’s actions, his or her self-image might take a long time to catch up. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
After acting a certain way for many years, it’s still possible to experience residual self-image dissonance from our adolescent experiences. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Some of the most outwardly successful people in the world continue to experience intermittent episodes of imposter syndrome. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
However, this shouldn’t stress, depress or deter you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Approaching the process with compassion for your current character is essential, along with the knowledge that you’re the product of your previous experiences. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Only by relinquishing the past and changing your character’s actions in the present can you begin your transformation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Rewrite the script<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Changing your character for the life you want instead of the one you’ve got is part and parcel of personal growth<\/a>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
- I believe in minimalism<\/a>. Is this useful frame or just a response to fear of spending money and financial scarcity? Investing in a few quality purchases and exploring my reactions to these lifestyle decisions is an ongoing area of exploration.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n
- I believe in exercise – this is a valid assumption; good empirical evidence exists for its benefits and personal experience demonstrates that I feel better engaging in this healthy habit<\/a>.<\/li>