{"id":1862,"date":"2019-01-19T14:30:32","date_gmt":"2019-01-19T14:30:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bloomsoup.com\/?p=1862"},"modified":"2022-05-18T09:55:46","modified_gmt":"2022-05-18T09:55:46","slug":"avoiding-eye-contact","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bloomsoup.com\/avoiding-eye-contact\/","title":{"rendered":"11 Pseudoscientific Reasons for Someone Avoiding Eye Contact"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

We locked eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was all we could do, the deafening roar of thousands of tons of water plummeting over the edge every second.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019d thought there\u2019d been something contained in that brief glance, but couldn\u2019t be sure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She looked like she might be local, a Latina with olive skin and dark hair.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Perhaps I was just a curiosity, a strange-looking gringo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Anyway, I was here to enjoy the waterfall, I thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gazing out at La Garganta Del Diablo, the Devil\u2019s Throat, I was suitably impressed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A fine mist spread out from the falling water and back to the platform where we enjoyed the view of Iguazu Falls, one of the biggest waterfalls in the world, straddling the borders of Argentina and Brazil.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But I couldn\u2019t stop thinking about that eye contact. Did it mean anything, or was I reading something into nothing?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was desperately ill after all…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019d come down with a heavy cold and struggled through an overnight journey from Brazil, barely able to think straight.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I chanced another quick look and sure enough, she met my gaze again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To see how the story ended, check out number 9.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Anyway, back on topic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Quick summary<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Ok, for those of you who just want the juice, here it is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. They're anxious\n2. They want to end the conversation\n3. They're distracted\n4. There are trust issues\n5. They feel intimidated\n6. One of you is talking too much\n7. They're bored\n8. They don't like you\n9. There's no sexual chemistry\n10. You're conversing on a complex topic\n11. They're secretive<\/pre>\n\n\n\n
\"\"\/<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
\"What<\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n
If you’re happy with the short summary, great.

However, eye contact issues are often part of a bigger conversation around body language.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For further reading on how to interpret the subconscious signals of others, check out ‘What Every BODY is Saying<\/a>‘, an awesome book about an ex-FBI agent’s guide to speed-reading people.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n
\n\n Check it out on Amazon<\/a>\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n
The reality<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
There are many reasons for avoiding eye contact.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But even though it\u2019s a natural phenomenon, it can still make you feel like a bit of a lemon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Especially when you\u2019re trying your hardest to be a good little conversationalist or public speaker<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Perhaps such shifty looks are making you doubt your abilities as a smooth operator in social situations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So for some reassurance, let\u2019s take a look at the science.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
First though, let\u2019s put eye contact under the magnifying glass.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The evolution of eye contact<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
From a psychological standpoint, eye contact has been essential to our growth as a species.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
From cooperating in groups, determining our status to identifying a potential mate, the ability to work well in groups was essential.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As Charles Darwin<\/span> said,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“In the long history of humankind, those who learned to collaborate and improvise most effectively have prevailed.”<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n
After all, social groups provided safety and access to vital resources for survival.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And before\u00a0speech, all we had to rely on for group communication was body language<\/a>, meaning that identifying subtle cues was essential.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Like a herd of gazelle watching each other for signs of threats, so too we developed our own little tricks, like eye contact.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This meant that our wise old ancestors had to be masters of subconscious messaging.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As Malcolm Gladwell points out in his book, Blink<\/a>, our ability to gain a fuller picture of our environment is largely thanks to our subconscious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Perhaps that explains my attraction to the art of communication<\/a> through improvised dance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Anyways, let\u2019s look at some of the reasons why your chums, acquaintances or work colleagues might avoid eye contact.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So if eye contact is so useful, why do some people persistently avoid it, and what can we infer about such behaviour?<\/p>\n\n\n